Perfection… Was Grandfather a
perfect man? Obviously this is an unfair question, but just how close was he? I
can jog my memory and remember about him a few of the things that some might
say made him imperfect. I remember
that he occasionally belched at the table during Sunday dinner, which always
prompted Grandmother to make him give each of his grandchildren a quarter. Once
in a while he might slip up and the dialogue in his company would become
slightly PG-13, which also earned the grandkids a quarter. He took the “blame
the dog” excuse one step further, and was in fact known to “blame the nearest
grandchild” once in a while. Sometimes
he would drag Grandmother across town spending two or three extra dollars in
gas to save 25 cents on a gallon of milk or a quart of oil. And Heaven help the
waitress that tried to refuse one of his coupons, because there would be a
reckoning. It’s funny how those little idiosyncrasies about a person that are
sometimes kind of irritating at the time, are nothing but fond memories when that
person is gone.
On a more reverent note, if I wanted to
share my best childhood memories of my Grandfather, I would have to write a
complete autobiography simply because he was such a huge part of my life that
no certain memory can be taken individually. There are literally hundreds of things that
could fall into the column of “reasons why my Grandfather was perfect”. I won’t list them all, since every member of this
family knows exactly where I’m coming from.
But the thing that truly sticks with me about
Grandfather is that no matter where we were in life, or what we thought of him,
or what we did, he always believed that We
were perfect. Although this may be a stereotypical way for grandparents to feel
about their grandkids, with him it was different. There was such a sincerity
and deep love and devotion that came with it. It was not a denial, because I
know there were times where he disagreed with our decisions or paths, but at
the end of the day, you would never question how highly he thought of you,
whether he was right or not. His love and family devotion was so very
contagious and will forever be his legacy.
I am certain that I will undoubtedly spend
the rest of my life seeing things that make think of him such as crosswords,
scrabble games, jeopardy, and well, almost anything really. But the thing that
will most assuredly be in my heart forever is that not a second ever went by
where I felt anything but pure, unequaled, and undying love from him. So for
that reason, I can easily say that he may not have been a perfect man, but he
was 100% without question a PERFECT Grandfather; and his
cheerful demeanor will be sorely missed, yet used as an example and an
inspiration for all of us that were blessed by his time with us.
We were so fortunate to grow up with people who loved us unconditionally. More than that, they loved without any judgment, without any disappointment and without ever asking for more than our love in turn. Our grandparents were the epitome of such love. They were ever-present and ever-available, genuinely interested in us… our silly whims, our victories and failures, and our daily happiness. Their presence in our life brought us such joy and consistency. They made us each feel as if we were the most important thing in their lives. We are left with such grief in their absence. It’s hard to imagine not receiving the daily phone calls, hearing the loving expressions that have become so familiar, “You look beautiful today” – (over the phone! J ) EVERY day! J “Watch your drivin.’” “It’s a beautiful day.” “Look at the colors on the trees… the forsythias blooming…”
Grandmother
and Grandfather created and supported a little network of family that grew to
love and support them in return.
Grandfather became a member of our immediate family after Grandmother
died. We focused on trying to distract
him from his grief and that effort helped us to be distracted from our
own. He was such a blessing to us- a
great fan of the children, a fun presence in our daily lives and a constant
source of care and concern. I am so
grateful for the relationship my children were able to forge with him during
that time and for the memories they will have forever.
Grandmother and Grandfather…to some people those words may sound a
little too formal, more like titles rather than names. But for those fortunate enough to know Mae
and Wilbert Waterbury, these words captures all of the hidden meaning expressed
in other terms like grandma and grandpa, mamaw and papaw, mum mum and pop
pop. Grandmother and Grandfather are
names that elicit fond memories and feeling loved.
Of course, Wilbert Waterbury had other designations, like Daddy and
Willie, but—please pardon the obvious bias—I believe the title “Grandfather” is
most suitable for him. While parents are
burdened with the numerous responsibilities of training and disciplining
children, Grandparents can be freed to love and bless their grandchildren. The power of this unconditional love on a
person’s development cannot be overstated.
Without a doubt, Grandfather made the most of his three decades as
Grandfather. If this were the parable of
the talents, then he was the diligent servant that multiplied his Master’s
resources. And how did Grandfather
demonstrate this unconditional love to his grandchildren? Honestly, it’s difficult to describe. I just remember how his face would light up
as if he were excited to see us…like we were something important, how he would
cut out newspaper clippings that he wanted to show us and then hold on to them
for days until we next met, how he always seemed eager to go by Wal Mart or
Kroger to get us something, how he persistently reminded us to get food and
drink from the kitchen, how he always laughed at our jokes even when we botched
them, how he seemed to prefer playing outside in the cold with us children to
being inside and warm with the adults, how he stood outside waving goodbye and
flashing the porch light until the car was out of sight, and how he worked
diligently to share with us things that he had learned in life, like the
importance getting a good education, keeping stable income, and following the
law.
Yes, Grandfather shared wisdom with us that he attained from eclectic
sources like Will Rogers, Abe Lincoln, Bruce Williams, Ken Jennings, and even
Judge Judy. But it wasn’t what Grandfather said or did that
influenced us as much as it was how
he said and did it. He always seemed to
have a curiosity and appreciation for life.
The way he hummed and whistled demonstrated his conviction that it was
good to be alive. The way he would
“knock on wood” demonstrated his hope for tomorrow. The way he treated his family demonstrated
his belief that we were his most valuable treasure.
He is no longer here to manage the treasure that God entrusted to
him. But the seeds that he planted are
growing, and the harvest is multiplying.
Others now carry the distinction of being grandparents. Grandfather is now reunited with his first
love and also with his Maker. Surely, he has
heard the words that we all long to hear, “Well done.”
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